Monday, February 16, 2009

Week 4-5: Being Placed into a Narrow Category

What is Your Touchstone?

Dream: Publish a few different publications with myself as either publisher or editor of all (or both)

Touchstone: Ability to write what I care about and to disseminate information that is worthy of note in a wide variety of fields.

Role Model: Ben Franklin, the master of self-publishing and journalistic freedom

Target: Leave a legacy of informed and passionate intellectual/political discourse for a public that lacks unbiased and accountable access to both.

Myers-Briggs Personality Test


The Inspirer

As an ENFP, your primary mode of living is focused externally, where you take things in primarily via your intuition. Your secondary mode is internal, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit in with your personal value system.

ENFPs are warm, enthusiastic people, typically very bright and full of potential. They live in the world of possibilities, and can become very passionate and excited about things. Their enthusiasm lends them the ability to inspire and motivate others, more so than we see in other types. They can talk their way in or out of anything. They love life, seeing it as a special gift, and strive to make the most out of it.

ENFPs have an unusually broad range of skills and talents. They are good at most things which interest them. Project-oriented, they may go through several different careers during their lifetime. To onlookers, the ENFP may seem directionless and without purpose, but ENFPs are actually quite consistent, in that they have a strong sense of values which they live with throughout their lives. Everything that they do must be in line with their values. An ENFP needs to feel that they are living their lives as their true Self, walking in step with what they believe is right. They see meaning in everything, and are on a continuous quest to adapt their lives and values to achieve inner peace. They're constantly aware and somewhat fearful of losing touch with themselves. Since emotional excitement is usually an important part of the ENFP's life, and because they are focused on keeping "centered", the ENFP is usually an intense individual, with highly evolved values.

An ENFP needs to focus on following through with their projects. This can be a problem area for some of these individuals. Unlike other Extraverted types, ENFPs need time alone to center themselves, and make sure they are moving in a direction which is in sync with their values. ENFPs who remain centered will usually be quite successful at their endeavors. Others may fall into the habit of dropping a project when they become excited about a new possibility, and thus they never achieve the great accomplishments which they are capable of achieving.

Most ENFPs have great people skills. They are genuinely warm and interested in people, and place great importance on their inter-personal relationships. ENFPs almost always have a strong need to be liked. Sometimes, especially at a younger age, an ENFP will tend to be "gushy" and insincere, and generally "overdo" in an effort to win acceptance. However, once an ENFP has learned to balance their need to be true to themselves with their need for acceptance, they excel at bringing out the best in others, and are typically well-liked. They have an exceptional ability to intuitively understand a person after a very short period of time, and use their intuition and flexibility to relate to others on their own level.

Because ENFPs live in the world of exciting possibilities, the details of everyday life are seen as trivial drudgery. They place no importance on detailed, maintenance-type tasks, and will frequently remain oblivous to these types of concerns. When they do have to perform these tasks, they do not enjoy themselves. This is a challenging area of life for most ENFPs, and can be frustrating for ENFP's family members.

An ENFP who has "gone wrong" may be quite manipulative - and very good it. The gift of gab which they are blessed with makes it naturally easy for them to get what they want. Most ENFPs will not abuse their abilities, because that would not jive with their value systems.

ENFPs sometimes make serious errors in judgment. They have an amazing ability to intuitively perceive the truth about a person or situation, but when they apply judgment to their perception, they may jump to the wrong conclusions.

ENFPs who have not learned to follow through may have a difficult time remaining happy in marital relationships. Always seeing the possibilities of what could be, they may become bored with what actually is. The strong sense of values will keep many ENFPs dedicated to their relationships. However, ENFPs like a little excitement in their lives, and are best matched with individuals who are comfortable with change and new experiences.

Having an ENFP parent can be a fun-filled experience, but may be stressful at times for children with strong Sensing or Judging tendancies. Such children may see the ENFP parent as inconsistent and difficult to understand, as the children are pulled along in the whirlwind life of the ENFP. Sometimes the ENFP will want to be their child's best friend, and at other times they will play the parental authoritarian. But ENFPs are always consistent in their value systems, which they will impress on their children above all else, along with a basic joy of living.

ENFPs are basically happy people. They may become unhappy when they are confined to strict schedules or mundane tasks. Consequently, ENFPs work best in situations where they have a lot of flexibility, and where they can work with people and ideas. Many go into business for themselves. They have the ability to be quite productive with little supervision, as long as they are excited about what they're doing.

Because they are so alert and sensitive, constantly scanning their environments, ENFPs often suffer from muscle tension. They have a strong need to be independent, and resist being controlled or labelled. They need to maintain control over themselves, but they do not believe in controlling others. Their dislike of dependence and suppression extends to others as well as to themselves.

ENFPs are charming, ingenuous, risk-taking, sensitive, people-oriented individuals with capabilities ranging across a broad spectrum. They have many gifts which they will use to fulfill themselves and those near them, if they are able to remain centered and master the ability of following through.

Reflection:

There are a lot of things that I both agree and disagree with here. Part of the reason for that was the fact that, when I got the results in, I wasn't expressing very strongly in any category except for iNtuitive, which I generally agree with. I think the general overall view presented here is correct, though I find myself to be more practical than idealistic at many times. Further, I can't talk my way out of anything the way this implies that I can (but boy do I wish I could).

In some respects, I must admit that the test knew me better than I knew myself. Saying that I had poor follow-through is very accurate, and suggesting that it might affect my romantic relationships is....sadly all too true. I've made mistakes in that regard that I will never fully recover from. 

That being said, I feel like the concept of the Myers-Briggs test is good for people who really don't understand themselves, if even then. It is also my understanding that it is not well respected in psychological fields. Those things being said, I found this to be somewhat valuable.

Monday, February 2, 2009

Week 3 (Where I get everything I didn't realize I wanted)

Exercise 4: Pick a Color
Deep red, kind of a burnt, orangey-red.
I'm bold, comfortable, fiery, I'm baking like a rock in some canyon out west, I'm sierra, I'm plain, but eye catching. I'm...(not sure what else to say)

Exercise 5: The Private-Eye Game
The place is a mess. This person seems to be either in the process of cleaning up the room or trashing it.
There are some books, ranging from a travel guide about china, a collection of poetry by allen ginsberg, a few classic novels, a pamphlet on the life of the prophet mohhamed, a few books on buddhism, a statue of the buddha, a copy of the Bhagavad Gita, and some textbooks (as the person who lives in this room, I have to jump in and say that I've mainly skimmed any of these books. Others I have actually read, others I've barely picked up.) There is no discernable order. The place is covered in various colors of earth tones. There are papers and magazines and newspapers and pamphlets and fliers, and booklets of every kind in haphazard piles all over the desk, window sill, dresser, and headboard of the bed. The carpet hasn't been vaccuumed in ages. Two guitars, one amp, a couple of pedals.
There are three lamps, lampshades all somewhat askew (or broken) In the closet a wide selection of plaid and flannel button-up shirts, some thrift-store suit jackets, a kimono, a track jacket, two cowboy hats, a wooden sword, an old 8mm video camera.
Lots of posters, most having to do either with space or cowboys one big tapestry, a poster of the beatles yellow submarine (the movie, not the album)
The desk is wood, the dresser is wood, the headboard is faux wood, and there is a wooden cup full of change that is engraved with flowers. There seems to be some order to all of this mess, but whatever it is I can't understand it.

Exercise 6: Seeing Yourself as Other See You [Version No 2: Creating Your Cheering Section]

I would actually prefer to do the Version No 1, but everybody is pretty busy right now and I'd rather not bother them. This post is also LATE (because I can't figure out how to post it) and I have other homework to do tonight. I'll get back to this tomorrow.


Exercise 7: Twenty Things You Like to Do

What I Like to Do: How long since last done? Costs Money or Free Alone or with Someone? Planned or Spontaneous Job Related Physical Risk Fast or Slow-paced Mind, Body, or spiritual
Go bowling over a year costs money, unless you have a bowling ball and pins, which I used to In groups, probably be fun alone too Spontaneous (who plans to go bowling?) Not at all not unless you suck at it Both? Mind+Body (Zen Bowling? It could happen.)
Going on long walks a few days very free both enjoyable Again, who plans to go on a walk? Sure, so is sitting not unless you suck at it Slow, thats the point All three
Drinking Tea Less than an hour very little money involved both enjoyable weird question If I have things my way Its good for you depends on the tea Body...mind...there arent many things a person can do that are NOT spiritual, are there?
Riding Bikes Not since I slipped on the ice Free, unless you leave you bike out in the snow depends on the situations Both Not at all More than you might think depends on the day all
Reading the News A day, roughly Free with internet, otherwise inexpensive Alone whenever the mood strikes Not exactly more risky to report the news than to read it Slow Strictly mind, ok
Watching Star Trek Less than a day Free with internet, otherwise inexpensive Either Planned, I look forward to it haha, NO! more risky to BE in space than to watch shows about space Slow spiritual (That video we watched on the first day of this class made me have a weird thing about Captain Kirk. I had never seen Star Trek Before that.)
Fast Paced Conversation Not sure, pretty frequently Free! as many people as possible spontaneous sometimes heart attack FAST! bingo!
Slow paced, emotional conversation All the time free with one person spontaneous uhhh...nah none S l o w minus the body
Traveling Kind of relative, I traveled to the living room a few minutes ago, havent left the state in almost a year (disgusting) expensive good people depends not really depends on the trip, the Badlands were pretty sketchy Varies yes
playing music a few days free to play, expensive to have access to both, kind of prefer by myself nothing like an impromptu beatbox session dumb question sweating ummm, moreso fast yes
Watching People (without being creepy...?) constant Free, sometimes interesting people hang out at expensive places though alone is good, funnier with people depends no getting caught Slow spiritual, maybe? Kind of mind? Not sure
Getting into bars even though I'm not 21 and I don't have a Fake I.D. about a month VERY expensive. Unless you have generous friends who've had a bit to drink Never alone Both get real plenty Fast not sure, very gratifying though
Talking to Old Folks Whenever I get the chance free With old folks Both define old sometimes falling asleep is a concern Very slow not body
Talking to pretty girls Everyday (I make a point of it) ((not really, that was a joke)) (((sort of))) Free, not interested in prostitutes With pretty girls no comment...? just my mom (weird) depends what you say fast, otherwise they get bored mind and spiritual
Sneaking into movies A few months Free, thats right With someone, but not at the same time as them Meticulously planned I wish getting caught slow, gotta play it coooool All, very gratifying
Smoking hookah (tobacco) in my living room while doing homework current depends whose turn it is to buy sheisha With my roomates and other people who distract me As you like it Sometimes, don't tell Cancer (oh god!) Slow Body and spiritual
Guilty pleasure: taking really lame quizzes online too long free, dont take the ones that make you pay alone, dont tell anybody Spontaneous procrastination no, but sometimes its hard to separate emotional risk of people knowing youre taking a stupid online quiz or getting undesired answers Slow Mind (soulless)
Cooking Also relative, I mean really nice meals though. Its been a few weeks. money, sadly For people I prefer planned nope burns, salmonella, burning the apartment down (more likely than you'd think) Slow until the critical moment when everything's going at once and you're freaked about ruining the food. All, and more
Playing Frisbee (why didnt I think of this before?) Since summer (remember sunshine?) I lost my frisbee, so I have to buy a new one playing frisbee alone would be absurd “hey man, wanna toss a disk later?” you tell me what a great job that would be being barefoot in parks in chicago catered to the situation YES!!!
Going swimming in warm water, with nice beaches That one night last summer Free (all good things) Never considered doing it alone, maybe I'll check that out Spontaneous would be better ::sigh:: I would ruin my computer wicked waves...glass in the sand... lake sharks Depends who youre with All three
Be organized its never happened, seems great though I wouldnt know Ask later Planned, I would imagine sadly, not really ...???...???...???...???...??? Probably be inaccurate if it were fast paced Yeah, all of 'em

Exercise 8: You Ideal Environment

This is gonna be great!!!!!

Here's what I'm imagining: Me and a group of similarly dispositioned (but certainly not like-minded) individuals traveling around wherever we want, spending a lot of time outside talking and coming up with big plans. We would plan events and/or write factual news/feature pieces (for our own publication) that would expose social injustice and create positive change. We would also hold events, sometimes they would be socio-political in nature, others would be for the purpose of promoting unity of purpose and community. (I'm weirding myself out with how much of a hippie fantasy this is.)
We would go everywhere. Literally everywhere. We would meet a lot of people and we would see a lot of awe-inspiring things, but we would also work hard and help people out. I'm feeling like there would be a strong element of physical labor involved in this, but I think thats just because I like it.
A lot of work, a lot of play, a lot of meaning in our lives.
And then, when we were kind of tired or needed a rest, good comfortable, humble homes where we could go to be alone.

Exercise 9: Your Ideal Day

This day is ridiculous. I don't necessarily know exactly how ideal it is, but I like the way it's sounding right now:

I wake up with the sun on a secluded beach in the mountains somewhere. Somewhere temperate and near the ocean. I immediately take a swim in the ice cold lake and use the heat of the day to dry me off as I sit on a rock, fishing for my breakfast. Once I catch, cook and eat my meal alone, I wander off into the forest, eating nuts and berries that I find along the way.
In a little while, I meet up with a group of my friends. Some old friends, some new friends, some fast friends, some best friends, etc. Probably about 5-6 people (the number of people on the third floor of our building, my extended roommate family, that's ironic)
We go to a small village in the forest where we're them helping build their village (I'm not sure why). A small handful of younger tribespeople can communicate with us. With the older ones, we use gestures, facial expressions and sometimes translation. We've been here for a few weeks and we're leaving later in the day. The people thank us for their help and we humbly accept their thank you.
We return, then, to the ocean where we left our boat, and begin to sail back to whatever the nearest town/city is. It takes the better part of the day to get back, and we're starving by the time we get back. We have lunch at the marina, and I start work on a piece I want to do about the tribe, their culture, their people, and how it's all being affected by encroaching civilization. (Reasons I should write for National Geographic #1)
I call my editor, pitch the story, he likes it and wants an outline by the end of the day (yikes!). I grab my fellow traveler's notes/journals/film (whatever) and head back to wherever I'm staying to start sifting through.
It takes basically all day to get through the information, and I'm in a huge mess of stuff, throwing around pieces paper, film, photos trying to piece something together. I start work on the outline, knowing that I'm gonna be late getting it in, also knowing that I'm gonna be late to meet up with my fabulous girlfriend, so I call and apologize. I get lucky, she was running late as well (unusual for her).
I turn the outline in, late but my editor expects that by now. They like the content, the photos, says it'll probably be front page but can't promise anything (I'm used to this by now, but it's still gratifying).
I meet up with the girl and we trade stories about what we've seen and done since we last saw each other. It's great to be back. We talk about great places we'd like to live together and lives that we could have. I decide that one day I'm going to publish and write my own magazine. Just a small thing with a few other writers, but hopefully big economic backing so we have lots of flexibility to do whatever we want. I decide that when we live together, I want to help build our house, with my hands.
We go to one of her rich friend's parties, its a kind of a swanky affair and its pretty fun, some good people there but naturally it gets a little tired. I spend the rest of the night walking around with her, just goofing and talking. We decide to go to a beach (different beach) to sleep. The moon is high over us and I couldn't be happier.

Fantasy Analysis [this includes questions 1-7]

INDISPENSABLE:
What:
A job that is much more than a job
Occupational freedom of some kind
Independence
Manual Labor
Nature

Who:
Great friends, new friends
The best girlfriend/fiance/wife of all time

Where:
Everywhere, lots of travel
A beautiful home (not a house, but a place)
Beaches

OPTIONAL, BUT STILL DESIRABLE:
What:
Bohemian lifestyle
Being on the front cover
Who:
A boss who puts up with my nonsense (I can learn to overcome disorganized work)
Rich acquaintances
Tribespeople

Where:
The ocean
A beautiful house would be great too, I didn't mention it though. I'd settle for “great apartment” too.

FRILLS:
What:
A writing profession
A sailboat

Who:
I can do without many friends, I feel, as long as I have a few good ones and am able to meet cool, new people on occasion.
Where:
Being somewhere remote (I think that's what I was describing.)
A city

Monday, January 19, 2009

When I Was Your Age...

1. Why are you taking Leadership for Change?

I think I have a decent idea of what direction I want my life to go in. That being said, I've never been the kind of person to set goals or even been the kind of person to spend much effort thinking ahead. With a little over a year until I graduate college, I'm horrified about entering the uncertainty of "the real world", so I've decided that I need to work hard on giving myself the tools I need to be happy and productive with my later life.


Also, took a class last semester with Prof. Rockquemore and it was a great experience. She's a great person to be teaching a class like this one. (Forgive the "brown-nosing", I'm just being honest.)


2. What do you hope to get out of the course?

There are certain personality traits of mine that I've come to recognize as detrimental both to my productivity and to my life as a whole. I want to identify all similar personality traits and begin the hard work of putting them out.


Additionally, I would like to work towards making myself a more effective communicator.


3. Tell us about who you were as a child by answering the following questions posed by Barbara Sher (chapter 1): What especially attracted and fascinated you as a child? What sense (sight, hearing, touch) did you live most through, or did you enjoy them all equally? What did you love to do, or to daydream about, no matter how “silly” or unimportant it may seem to you now? What were the secret dreams, fantasies, and games that you never told anybody about? Does it feel like there’s still a part of you that loves those things? What talents or abilities might those early interests and dreams point to?

(As a preliminary note, I'd like to point out that the word "child" is ambiguous. For the purposes of this assignment I'm gonna use until about ten years old. I'd also like to point out that my memory on this is pretty vague, and there are probably people who know me now that knew me better then than I know my then-self now :-D)


What especially attracted and fascinated you as a child?

One of the things that I remember most in my childhood is that I spent a lot of time making stuff. I was a big fan of legos, model rockets for a little while, puzzles, stuff like that. I also liked making up games either with myself or with other people. I was also really active and spent a lot of time playing sports, being particularly drawn to baseball, extreme skating (ramps etc.), and roller hockey. I had a big thing about fantasy worlds with dragons and wizards and knights and all kinds of other geeky stuff. Also had a particular interest in space (p.s. Space Camp is one of the best things that ever happened to me, even now.)


What sense (sight, hearing, touch) did you live most through, or did you enjoy them all equally? 

The sense question is a strange one. I'm really not sure, honestly. I'm inclined to say sight, but I think that's only because sight is the most frequently used sense. Although, I do have strong memory of there being a lot of primary colors in my childhood. Instead I think I'll say touch, except I'd like to expand touch to include feeling; from physical touching to include emotional feeling.


What did you love to do, or to daydream about, no matter how “silly” or unimportant it may seem to you now?

I kind of answered the question of what I liked to do previously (oops!), so I'll focus on daydreaming. The answer is that I truly have no idea. I really couldn't tell you. I have some recollection of wanting to go to cool new places, but I'm really not sure if that's accurate or not. I also wanted a time machine. Oh, and I remember taking plants and berries and flowers and stuff out of the yard and mashing them together to try to make "medicine" pretending to be, like, a shaman or something. As I'm writing, I've also remembered that I spent a LOT of time exploring, etc. Cool story: I had this dream once that I found "paradise", like a Shangri-La or something and it was really fun. When I woke up, I set off to try to find it in the local forest preserve. Guess what? I didn't find it.


What were the secret dreams, fantasies, and games that you never told anybody about?

Same answer as above, really. As far as games go, I had a million. A lot of my games were pretty competitive, but I usually only played against myself. I also remember that I put quite a bit of time and effort into not stepping on the cracks in streets or sidewalks. I didn't believe in that "break your mother's back" thing though.


Does it feel like there’s still a part of you that loves those things? 

Yes, and it's a bit depressing knowing that a lot of those ideas and behaviors are pretty much phased out of my life. I've been growing up, what can I say?


What talents or abilities might those early interests and dreams point to?

I've realized some interesting things writing this. This is a fascinating assignment, by the way. One of the things I realized is just how much time I spent alone, which is quite a bit. I'm not really sure what that indicates, but I can definitely say that is neither true nor my preference now. I also realized that I was more left-brained than I seem to have thought. I still really like building/making stuff but haven't done much of it at all in recent times, although I did used to want to be an architect. I realized that I should go to the gym more often, because it's fun to play sports and it feels good to be healthy like that. 

It's kind of frustrating, I feel like there are so many interests that I could be pursuing/working towards making a living on, but I really don't feel like I have TIME to do that. I waste a lot of time that I don't have to, thats the other thing. I should work towards better use and organization of my time. Another realization is that, despite spending so much time alone, I really think I'm pretty good at interacting with people and that I'm good with bringing people together as well as mediating conflict. Despite knowing this, I'm not the most confident in school or work situations that require utilization of those skills. I should be.


A random side note: If any Internet-surfing millionaires end up reading this and decide that they want to pay me to wander around the world, make stuff, talk to cool people, and write about my experiences, then I'm interested in excepting their endorsement. BUT, I only accept cash payment.



4. E-mail at least one person in your family who loves you, knew you when you were a child, and has internet access. Let them know you are taking this class and invite them to follow your blog.

I'm gonna go ahead and e-mail two people. My grandfather, Granddad Cannon (good name, isn't it), and my father-father, Daddo, Daddy-o, Poppola, Steve, Dude (and a vast assortment of other nicknames, all equally endearing and colorful). These two were chosen for their good advice, kind words, exceptional caring, and for the high degree of respect that I have for them (Not that these traits are exclusive to them, not by any stretch of the imagination, but I expect that their input into my experience in this class will be the most valuable.) 


((They're also the best looking.))


SORRY THIS POST WAS SO LONG!!!